Recipes for Living Darrell , Vicky and Brian Mateer

My childhood was a little different from some. My parents, Gerdon and Ruby Kirk, lived on 60-acre farm north of Lorimor. I was the middle child of three girls all raised on the farm. I was boon May 23, 1943. My mother was a good person, but her life was unhappy and consequently her children’s' were. She was very nervous and high strung; which made for lots of friction in our home.

In addition to farming, my father drove a school bus for 19 years; but I don’t remember him ever being well. From the age of 21, he had a debilitating form of arthritis that caused him to be stoop shouldered. In fact, in his final years, his vision would have been about belt-buckle level. However, he was a man of virtue. He never complained. This was a trait noticed not only by his immediate family and friends. After his death in 1995, Dr. Lynn Struck, who had attended him, wrote the family:

I would like to extend my deepest sympathies regarding your recent loss. Gerdon always had such a positive attitude and I know he will be missed by many people. You were all so very supportive of him during his illness. This is greatly respected.

During my early years, I spent all my time with Daddy. He took me to the field, sat me under a tree, and I stayed there until he came back. From the time I could walk, I rode the tractor with him. I suppose that could be the reason I don't like to keep house. I never knew what it was like to go to clubs, or do other typical "girl-things." I enjoyed the farm, riding our horses and activities like that. I enjoy being with people, but compared to many, my social life is limited. From kindergarten on, I went all my school years to Lorimor. It was an independent school district until 1960, when it consolidated with four others-Thayer, Arispe, Afton, and Shannon City. I enjoyed sports and played basketball. I particularly remember two teachers; Harold and Darlene Norris, who are George's parents. They taught in high school. Darlene was a business teacher. They had two sets of children and my younger sister babysat the younger ones. They were special people, always being there when someone needed them.

I married young, in 1959. My first husband was Marvin Busick, whose family lived here in Osceola. We had three children: Danny Joe, born in Osceola, March, 1961; Scott, born in Rolla, Missouri, in July, 1963; and Shane, born in Osceola in December, 1967. Marvin worked on construction, mainly in Missouri, where we lived until 1967. One of my dearest and most enduring friendships began in 1963 with Sue Hayes, who lives in Unionville, Missouri. Just yesterday (February 3, 2000) we met for lunch in Corydon and sat in the restaurant talking for five hours. We never miss a birthday or anniversary as an opportunity to get together.
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Dan started to school in a private kindergarten in Hamilton, Missouri, in 1966, and in May, 1967, the boys and I moved to Murray so that he could go to school there. All the boys got their education in that school. I had children in the Murray school from 1967 until 1999, when Brian graduated.

Marvin didn't move to Murray with us but came on weekends; and by the early 1970’s our marriage had begun to fall part. I think we probably just outgrew one another. We were not divorced until 1979. He has since remarried and lives in Missouri. Since 1971 I have lived in the same house in Murray where I am living now, at 702 Maple.

The situation forced me to be independent. I sold Avon products for income and in 1974, Opal Smith asked if I would come to work for her in what is now the Family Table. I didn't want to do that but she said, "Come for a week and try it." I went to work when Shane started to school.

I was so fortunate that the boys were good kids. There were lots of activities. Not one of them - Dan, Shane or Scott - ever missed a sport. We kind of all grew up together. Dan, being the oldest, took care of all of us. The load always fell on him and as a result he and I were particularly close. I look back on my life and wonder if there is anything I'd have changed. No, there isn't. I have my boys to show for my life and I feel that is what I was put here for. It is what I was supposed to do.

Darrell and I started dating in January, 1980, and were married December 1 of that year. He had previously married Donna Burrell in 1972. They divorced in 1979. They had a daughter, Elizabeth, Mrs. Jim Blubaugh, of Chariton. She is married and has a son and three step-children.

Darrell was the son of Eugene and Ruth Mateer. He was born February 2, 1943, and in 1946, when he was three, they moved to a farm on highway 69 south of Osceola. It is still in the family. Brian is operating it now.

Darrell had a younger brother, Michael, who was born in 1948. He died in November, 1954, at the age of six. He fell out of the hay loft and died instantly. Ruth was at a funeral of another child and they came to get her. When they told her he had been hurt, Ruth knew immediately that he was gone. Gene said, "Come on, Ruth we have to hurry" and she asked, "Why?” I think mothers know these things. Years later when I was told that Dan had been in an accident, I knew without being told that he was gone.

Eugene and Ruth never recovered from the tragedy. As a memorial, Ruth gave the church a picture which is hanging in the east corridor, just outside the nursery door, with Michael's picture and specifics of his life. On every anniversary of his death, Ruth put flowers on his grave. In 1994, while she was in the hospital, she asked me to continue the tradition. There is no way I could not have done it.

Through 8th grade, Darrell went to Vernon country school and on to Osceola for high school. He graduated in 1962. His love for farming was developed in FFA (Future Farmers of America). His love for John Deere tractors developed while he worked nearly all his school years with his uncle Everett Mateer, in his John Deere Implement Store on East Webster. Darrell had little time left for other activities.

After graduation, he served in the Army Reserve. When he was discharged, he started doing custom farming, which he has been doing ever since. With the addition of chemicals, that was his business when we were married. He was a chemical dealer and custom applicator. In 1988, Doug Peterson, Darrell, and Dan bought the existing W.R. Grace Fertilizer business and combined the chemical fertilizer and feed business into Circle D Ag. They divided responsibilities: Doug had feed and switched to fertilizer; Darrell had the chemical part; Dan took over the feed. Scott has worked with us since 1982, first with Mateer Sprayers and then for Circle D. That is the business we are continuing. We are locally owned and operated-one of the few such businesses in the state.

Brian was born in Des Moines on September 1, 1981. He came nine days early and was born exactly nine months to the day from when we were married. We have always laughed at Darrell saying that four of us went to Hawaii for our honeymoon and five of us came back. The couple who went with us were Gary and Delores Robins of Murray, who were celebrating their
25th wedding anniversary.

Tragedies and accidents have struck our family in clusters. During the first year of our marriage, there was a crisis every month. In March Dan died in a car accident in Nebraska. Gary and Delores lost their son in a car accident. In May I fell down a flight of 30 stairs. Dave and Connie Flaherty had a winding stairway in their home and I missed the first step. Darrell said I didn't miss a step after that. I hit every one and it felt like it. It was the last week in May and I was very pregnant but fortunate not to have had a miscarriage. (Brian had to be tough or he'd never have survived that pregnancy. And he is!) Scott had a bad car accident on June 20, and we went to Nebraska for his surgery.

Brian Mateer, a senior at Murray High School, was one of six district Star Farmers who competed for the Iowa Star Farmer award at the Iowa FFA conference in Des Moines. The FFA Star Farmer was won by Scott Sandeen, a senior from Eddyville. "Though I did not win, it was quite an honor to be chosen," Brian said. Brian has been involved in farming since he was eight years old when a cow unexpectedly showed up in his grandfather’s pasture. After no one claimed it, his grandfather gave the calf to Brian. That was a start of his dream of one day owning his own farm. Today he owns 50 percent of 236 acres. He raises cows, crops, hay and shows pigs for his 4-H Club, Osceola Go Getters. In addition he has been active in sports at Murray and works part time at Circle D Ag in Osceola. Brian, son of Vicky and Darrell Mateer, has been active in FFA for more than four years. He participates in livestock and soil judging, was creed speaker and sentinel and vice president of the Murray FFA. He was second in the beef division at the Block and Bridle Livestock Judging contest and placed 19th with his farm management team at the state convention. Brian, who has won numbers of individual FFA awards, plans to continue farming and attend Des Moines Area Community College.

Nothing would have pleased his grandparents more than for Brian to have made these choices for his life, because Brian was the light of their lives. He and his granddad were especially close. Gene confided in Brian things no one else knew. Brian and Scott have also been very close. Scott has been a very positive influence in Brian's life and he has always looked to him for advice and help.

Brian has gone on to purchase an additional 240 acres and now has approximately 500 acres. He has taken on another couple hundred acres to custom farm, following in his dad's footsteps as a custom farmer. He raises purebred Simmental Cattle. His activities are also farm related. At this time he is serving on the Farm Bureau Board of Directors, Clarke County Cattlemen’s Association, and Osceola Young Farmers. He goes to a meeting about every night.

On the same day as Michael's death, 39 years later, Gene had a massive stroke. He lived just five days in Mercy Hospital and died in December, 1993. His obituary gave details of his life:

Eugene Virgil Mateer, son of Arthur Newton Mateer and Pearl Dew Babbitt, was born October 16, 1912, in Havelock, Nebraska, and died December 5, 1993, at Mercy Hospital Medical Center in Des Moines. He was 81.

He graduated from Clarke County Schools and married Ruth Saddoris on February 27, 1939, at Council Bluffs. The couple became the parents of two sons, Virgil Darrell and Michael Tim.

He spent most of his life in Clarke County. Mr. and Mrs. Mateer lived for 50 years on their farm south of Osceola. Farming was Mr. Mateer's life. His greatest joy was planting and tending his crops and working with his cattle.

He was preceded in death by his son, Michael Tim at six years; his parents and three brothers, Dale Allen, Clayton and Earl Mateer.

Surviving Mr. Mateer are his wife; sons, Darrell Mateer and his wife, Vicky Mateer of Murray; grandson, Brian Virgil Mateer of Murray; granddaughter Elizabeth Mateer of Woodburn; step grandsons, Dan Busick, Scott Busick and Shane Busick, all of Murray; great-step grandsons, Jake and Josh Busick; brother, Everett Mateer and his wife, Mary Mateer of Osceola; sister, Ruth Page of Osceola; brothers-in-law, Joe Saddoris and his wife, Evelyn Saddoris, of Oskaloosa and Harold Saddoris of Muscatine; sisters-in-law, Juanita Mateer of Osceola; Meryle Saddoris of New Virginia and Leona McNichols of Leon; as well as other relatives and a host of friends.

Services for Mr. Mateer were held December 8 at the United Methodist Church in Osceola where he attended. The Rev. Judith Miller officiated. Organist Jean Hurd and soloist Jane Haider presented the musical selections: Whispering Hope, Be Not Afraid and The Lord's Prayer.

Casket bearers were Dan Busick, Scott Busick, Doug Petersen, Dennis Chaney, Fred Hembry and Tom Murrane. Honor bearers were Olin Eddy, Herbert Hamilton, Bill Short, Larry Redman, William Busse and Clarence Scholl. Interment was in Maple Hill Cemetery at Osceola. Arrangements were through Kale Funeral Homes.

On October 4 of the year of Gene's death, 1993, Ruth was diagnosed with breast cancer. In the summer of 1994 she was still well enough to go with Shirley Woods on a trip to Heifer Project in Perryville, Arkansas; and also on a bus tour to Wyoming. She went downhill rapidly after October of that year. She came to live with us in December, 1994, and lived with us until she died in March, 1995. Ruth's obituary, also, gave details of her life:

Ruth Mateer, daughter of Pearl and May Twombley Saddoris, was born September 3. 1914, in Clarke County and died of cancer March 9, 1995, at the Clarke County Hospital in Osceola.

She was 80. She married Eugene V. Mateer on February 27, 1939, and they became the parents of two sons, Virgil Darrell and Michael Tim.

Mrs. Mateer attended Clarke County Schools and later attended American Beauty School in Des Moines. She owned and operated her own shop for a number of years and then worked at Robinson's Department Store for 24 years.

After she retired she lived the life she loved on the farm where she and Mr. Mateer resided for 50 years. Her home, garden and grandchildren were her interests.

Mrs. Mateer attended the United Methodist Church in Osceola. She taught Sunday School and Bible School for many years.

In addition to her parents, Mrs. Mateer was preceded in death by her husband of 54 years, Gene; son, Michael Tim at age six; four brothers, George (Dick), Henry, Chester (Bud) and Tom; two sisters, Henretta Price and Rhoda Lanz; and two brothers in infancy, Dean and Dale.

Mrs. Mateer is survived by her son, Darrell Mateer and his wife, Vicky Mateer, of Murray; two grandchildren, Brian and Elizabeth Mateer, step grandsons Dan Busick and his wife Teresa Busick and Scott and Shane Busick; sister, Leona McNichols of Leon; two brothers, Joe Saddoris and his wife, Evelyn Saddoris of Oskaloosa and Harold Saddoris of Muscatine; great-step grandsons, Jake and Josh Busick; brother-in-law, Everett Mateer and his wife, Mary Mateer, of Osceola; sisters-in-law, Merlye Saddoris of New Virginia, Ruth Page and Juanita Mateer of Osceola; as well as other relatives and friends.

Services for Mrs. Mateer were held March 12 at the United Methodist Church in Osceola, the Rev. Judith Miller officiating. Organist Jean Hurd accompanied Jane Haider as she sang The Lord's Prayer and What a Friend We Have in Jesus. The congregation sang Precious Lord, Take My Hand.

Casket bearers were Scott Busick, Tom Murrane, Doug Petersen, Dan Busick, Brian Mateer, Dennis Chaney, Larry Redman and Jim Blubaugh. Honorary casket bearers were Olin Eddy, Gary Robins, Fred Hembry, Bill Short, Clarence Scholl and Richard Murphy. Interment was in Maple Hill Cemetery at Osceola.

Those we hold most dear never truly leave us. They live on in the kindness they showed, the comfort they shared and the love they brought into our lives. “

Those who knew Ruth affirm her dedication and devotion to the Osceola United Methodist Church. She taught Sunday School in the lower grades and was one of 18 who participated in an eight-year study of the Genesis to Revelation series. She said that was her opportunity to read the Bible clear through, which she had always wanted to do. Her will generously provided money to the church to be used for general maintenance.

During the two-year period when we lost Gene and Ruth, it seemed that we barely raised our heads from one grief until we were struck by another. My dad fell in his basement and laid there for hours before he was found. He died of pneumonia in November, 1995, and Mom died in the Winterset Nursing Home on February 28, 1996.

The worst horror of a mother's life happened when Dan was killed on May 11, 1996. He was involved in a two car head-on crash on a gravel road west of Murray. Both drivers were killed. We had been gone for the weekend, buying Brian's first tractor. One of Darrell’s favorite TV shows is "Walker, Texas Ranger" and we got home just in time for him to see it. As we walked into the house, I said to Darrell, "Before you sit down, call the kids and tell them we're home." He called Teresa and said in one breath, "We're home. Bye. I want to watch 'Walker'" and started to hang up when she said, "Wait. There has been an accident. You need to go to the hospital." And I knew.

I have and will include Dan's obituary, but more precious to me is a piece written by my dear friend, Alice Brown:

When I first met Danny, he was seven years old. He had a sturdy little body, a riot of blonde curls covered his head, and he had a mischievous gleam in his eye. He ran to meet life.

I watched him grow up in my back yard. He and my son, Jay, were always building tree houses, club houses, sleeping in a tent in the back yard and running home from school with the bullies chasing them. Jay would be grumbling, "Danny, can't you ever keep your mouth shut?" Dan would just laugh.

When he became a teenager, I watched him dedicate himself to becoming a basketball player. Many many hours of practice in the gym paid off and he was indeed a fine ball player.

Dan married Teresa Henrich and they had two little boys, Jake and Josh. They were the joy of Dan's life. He loved to tell stories about them. Even after working such long hours that he would go to sleep sitting upright, he loved to tell stories about his boys.

In his telling of the stories, I could see him become, once again, the curly haired seven year old with the mischievous gleam in his eye. That is the way I will remember him.

A loving friend, Alice Brown

There were two other very special aspects of the funeral folder. Shane, who has a wonderful artistic talent, created the picture of an eagle in flight on the cover. We have used an eagle on Danny's tombstone because it symbolizes his life. On the folder, also, was a quote offered by Mary Ann Henrich, Teresa's mother: "Lord, help me remember that nothing is going to happen to me that you and I, together, can't handle."

The service was held at St. Bernard Catholic Church in Osceola, where Teresa and Dan had been married. Father John Frost and Rev. L. Duane Churchman officiated. Danny’s obituary follows:

Danny Joe Busick, son of Marvin Busick and Vicky Kirk Mateer, was born March 31, 1961, in Osceola, Iowa, and passed away May 11, 1996, in an automobile accident near Murray, Iowa, at the age of 35 years.

On May 28, 1983, he was united in marriage to Teresa Henrich in Osceola, Iowa, and two children, Jacob and Joshua were born to this union.

He was preceded in death by his grandfather, Russell Busick; grandparents, Gerdon and Ruby Kirk, and grandparents, Gene and Ruth Mateer.

He is survived by his wife, Teresa Busick of Murray, Iowa; two sons, Jacob and Joshua Busick of Murray, Iowa; mother Vicky Mateer and husband Darrell of Murray, Iowa; father, Marvin Busick and Pat of Kansas City, Missouri; brother, Scott Busick of Murray, Iowa; brother, Shane Busick of Key Largo, Florida; brother, Brian Mateer of Murray, Iowa; sister, Elizabeth Blubaugh and husband Jim of Chariton, Iowa; mother-in-law and father-in-law, Mary Ann and Don Henrich of Osceola, Iowa; grandmother, Lorene Busick of Gilbert, Iowa; as well as many other relatives and friends.

We were all left to grieve for Dan together. We are grateful that Dan's family lives close to us. Teresa is so good to share the boys with us. We know something of what she is going through and we try to help her all we can. She is employed at Bethphage in Osceola.

Scott isn't married. He lives in Murray and works in our business, Circle D Ag. Shane married Polly McFarland of South Bristol, Maine, on June 6, 1999. That was a wonderful day when approximately 25 people from Murray and Osceola attended the wedding in Key Largo, Florida. This included Dan's family, Teresa and the boys; and Doug's family, Carole and the girls. It was a special trip! Shane and Polly live in Key Largo, where he is operations manager in a large resort.

I have also enjoyed other trips: mission trips to Kentucky with Shirley Woods- delivering seed for a project called Growing for Carter County. Alice Brown and I also went overseas with Shirley to England, Ireland, Scotland, and Wales; and we took a bus tour to Niagara Falls and Washington, D.C. We had another to Key West, Florida; I have taken my grandson, Jacob, to Chicago and my grandson, Joshua, to Minden, Nebraska.

Darrell and I went to Hawaii on our honeymoon in 1981; to Frankfurt and Heidleberg, Germany, and to Paris in 1997; and to Puerto Vallarte, Mexico, in 1999. Darrell and I enjoy traveling and take advantage of every opportunity to go. I've been accused of keeping my suitcase packed and stored under the bed (and I do). We have been to several states in west and southwest U.S. and, of course, to Florida to visit Shane and his family.

Both Darrell and I have been involved in many ways in the Murray community and beyond. In 1969 I became a charter member of the Murray Chapter of Beta Sigma Phi; I am a member of Ophir Chapter of the Order of the Eastern Star. I served for 12 years on the Murray Board of Education, three years as President; 16 years on the County Compensation Board representing the County Supervisors; and on the State Governance Education Board. We both attend and are active in the Osceola United Methodist Church.

Darrell is a past president of the Farm Bureau, a member of the Clarke County Cattleman's Association, the Clarke County Extension Council, and the Murray Volunteer Fire Department.